Will Robert the Doll really be in the 2024 Fantasy Fest Parade?
David L. Sloan and Robert the Doll named Grand Marshals of Key West's Bud Light Fantasy Fest Parade
I’m excited, honored, and a little blown away to be selected as the Grand Marshal of Key West's Fantasy Fest Parade. I’ve been digging into past Fantasy Fest Grand Marshals and see I’m joining greats like Jimmy Buffett, Kelly McGillis, Coffee Butler, Tony Baltimore, Captain Finbar Gittelman, Diana Nyad, Howard Livingston, and Laverne & Shirley’s Cindy Williams. And that’s just scratching the surface. This year, there’s a lot of buzz and a little concern because I’m not the only Grand Marshal. I’m joined by the world’s most haunted doll, Robert!
Some people are loving this. Others are freaking out, A lot of questions are coming in, so I want to take a moment to answer the most frequent ones.
Why were you and Robert the Doll selected as Grand Marshals?
Robert is a powerful doll. He summoned Vince Neil from Mötley Crüe and Butch Patrick of The Munsters to his haunted fort, so I’m guessing he made this happen too. I was happy to accept the honor because it brings attention to Robert and The Key West Art & Historical Society. A lot of people don’t realize that Robert the Doll is owned by one of Key West’s oldest non-profit organizations.
Where do you come into the picture with the doll?
I started investigating Robert in 1996 before he was displayed as an artifact. I’ve since had the good fortune of uncovering Robert’s true origins and solving some of his greatest mysteries. The Key West Art & Historical Society is obviously aware of Robert’s paranormal influence, but their primary objective is protecting the doll as an artifact. I’ve collaborated with them for a couple of decades. My company, Ghost Key West, operates nighttime ghost tours and The Robert the Doll Experience at Fort East Martello.
Since arriving in Key West in 1904, Robert has always had a human companion who cares for the child spirit who possesses the doll. Gene Otto was first. A few years after Gene died, Myrtle Reuter took on the job. I arrived in Key West shortly after Myrtle died and picked up where she left off.
Isn’t it unusual to select a non-human as Grand Marshal?
This is very unusual but not unprecedented. Kermit the Frog was Grand Marshal in the 1996 Rose Bowl Parade, but he never cursed anybody. This is certainly the first time a haunted doll has been selected for the honor.
Will the real Robert the Doll actually be in the parade?
That’s not my call. Robert is powerful, but the doll that contains his spirit is fragile and valuable, so it is only removed from the protective display case at Fort East Martello Museum if a hurricane is threatening the island. The good news is that the box that contains the artifact doesn’t prevent the entities inside Robert from traveling freely. That’s part of why he receives letters of apology from around the world.
Even if the artifact doesn’t leave the fort, I have no doubt Robert will be with us in spirit.
Robert the Doll has a reputation for cursing people who disrespect him. Should people be concerned?
The people Robert curses have usually been very disrespectful to him. I’m talking about sticking out their tongues or giving him the finger. If people are respectful, they have nothing to worry about.
Did you ask for his permission to do any of this?
I never ask his permission. Asking for permission from a powerful entity can be dangerous. It sometimes opens doors you can’t close. Robert never told anyone to ask for his permission. It’s a manmade legend a lot of people believe. We’ve told Robert about the parade plans, and he seems to like them. Spirits thrive on energy. They can’t just eat a sandwich, so they rely on human energy to feed them. There’s enough human energy at Fantasy Fest to power the State of Florida, so I think Robert is going to be quite satisfied.
Is it safe to be around Robert? To photograph him? What are the rules? How do I avoid being cursed?
It’s very safe to be around Robert as long as you stay on his good side. He usually enjoys having his photo taken, too. The only rule I preach is respect. Respect the doll, respect the fort, and no one gets hurt.
Do you really think you can reverse the curse during the parade?
The cosmic portal on our float will transport everyone in the parade back to the 1990s. If everyone along the parade route gets creative with their costumes and turns the celebration up to 11… well, magic has been known to happen in the Florida Keys.
How can people communicate with Robert?
The best way to contact Robert is to send him a letter addressed to: Robert the Doll, Fort East Martello Museum, 3501 S. Roosevelt Blvd, Key West, FL 33040. If you can’t send a letter for some reason, e-mail Robert the Doll here. I’ll read those letters to Robert myself. Please do not call Ghost Key West’s reservation line or Fort East Martello Museum to communicate with Robert.
Will Key West ever be the same?
It never has been. It’s always been different. They say 2000-00 party over, oops, out of time. So this year I’m going to party like it’s 1999.
What does Robert think about all of this?
We’ll know soon enough.
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